Wednesday, January 17, 2007

There's only one thing worse than a broken heart...


My daughter has mid-terms this week. She was studying last night. I fell asleep in bed but woke up, instinctively, at midnight and looked out into the hallway and saw her just going into the bathroom to shower. I asked why it was so late and she was just getting into the shower. She said she was studying and walked into the bathroom and then closed the door.

One second later the door opened and she started crying, never making eye contact with me and said, "I miss Erik." My heart quickly sank and my stomach immediately went into sick mode. I asked, "Are things not going well?" and she said, "They haven't been." I guess they've been talking on the phone the last three days and things aren't going well.

I put my arms around her trying to console her and she laid next to me for about 10 minutes. I couldn't find anything to say that would make the moment better for her. So I said nothing. I knew if she wanted to talk more about it she would. I held her tight and rubbed her back and head.

She went into the shower and when she came out she slept in my bed, clutching the Teddy Bear that Erik had given her on their anniversary. By this time I was watching Leno and Letterman because now my stomach was upside down for her. Our backs were to one another and I didn't want to bring up conversation unless she was willing. I was more concerned with her being able to sleep. I could hear quiet little sniffles. I continued to watch Conan with one hand on her back. She fell asleep. And now I'm writing about it with my stomach still in knots.

They dated for a year and right after the one year mark when he headed off to college and the Homecoming event at school came around I noticed a marked difference but kind of expected that with him going off to college now. I didn't know who to worry more about, him or her. She's strong and he seemed to lack a little confidence when it came to their relationship, being a little insecure at times. I would ask her about the relationship and she would only say, "Don't worry mom, we have it under control." She wasn't willing to discuss it more so I would tell her I just wished I understood. They weren't hanging out as much and I didn't notice a lot of phone conversations. I was proud of them because for young kids they were very respectful of one another, were a joy to watch together and seemed to be maintaining a friendship. And now it seems that there's very little contact and she's sad.

I always dreaded the thought of her having a broken heart and so now you see that the only thing worse than a broken heart is watching your child suffer a broken heart.

5 Comments:

At January 17, 2007 11:37 AM , Blogger Seamus said...

Like all of us who've had broken hearts, the only way to the other side is through it! It is still the most painful thing to watch you children suffer through it though - good she has you to lean on! :)

 
At January 17, 2007 10:17 PM , Blogger Hollz said...

aww heartbreaks i've had my shareof them and they suck but time will heal and untill then she has a great mom there 4 her

 
At January 18, 2007 12:52 AM , Blogger Shay said...

I think that it's just so sweet that you worry so much over her heartbreaks - don't worry, every broken heart is a chance to learn more about who it is that she wants to end up with. ^_^

 
At January 18, 2007 7:34 PM , Blogger jillie said...

What an adoring mother you are and just comforting her in her time of need was probably more than words could ever do....she's a lucky young lady to have you for her mom ;o)

 
At January 18, 2007 7:44 PM , Blogger Pyrhonik said...

I agree with you. Parental support is the tough part, especially when they become adults.

(Hugs)

 

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