Saturday, September 19, 2009

When the Devil comes knocking at your door

I can deal with cancer and I can deal with college planning. I am having a hard time though dealing with a child who is being difficult and an ex that I invited to help. It always backfires in some way for me.

All the cancer surgeon asked me to do was eliminate stress and I've had nothing but stress for 2 weeks. A kid who is having difficulty adjusting to campus life. I wish I could be sympathetic but she's not having a hard time fitting in. It's more like the others kids don't measure up to her and her idea of friends. Hard to be sympathetic when dealing with a brat.

She wanted to drive to Providence to visit a friend at school last night. She's been a nightmare in some fashion each and every day. I called the ex to let him know her plans. He called her and told her she can't go. We didn't want her driving their alone, especially for the first time. It was rush hour and about 1-1/2 away.

Of course, she hates me more for telling him. He also told her to be home at a reasonable time last night and asked me to text him when she got home. She got home at 2:50 a.m. He came over today to talk to her and of course she wasn't receptive so he took the plates off her car. Mind you I own the car and its registered in my name. He took the plates with him, he said so I wouldn't cave in. I wouldn't but I'd like to have the plates here to the car that I own and insure.

We are in the works of buying her a much newer car. That topic came up while I was outside with him as he took the plates off the current car. He owes me about $2000 from April to June when she graduated. He doesn't seem to make an attempt to pay me. He told me that when we sell the current car that I can keep the money and we're even. I asked him how that was fair because it was my car. Well, that started a big long thing and him telling me that if I didn't agree he would call the lawyer forcing me to sell my house immediately to give him the remainder of the money I owe him. Child support ended when she graduated. I've been waiting for the money to make some minor repairs to put the house up for sale. He pretty much forces my hand and if I even question him he uses emotional blackmail and holds the house over my head.

He said I was giving him attitude for questioning him. I told him I wouldn't dare give him attitude because I know where it would end up and I continued to sob at the unfairness he throws around. Then he proceeded to say "you wanted the divorce" mind you loudly so the neighbors walking past the house could hear, "so now this is what you get."

I just quietly sobbed and walked in the house. Now knowing how much the kid hates me lately and dealing with the devil I let in to help parent his child. I should have known better.

I can't wait to wrap my head around emptying the house of unneeded stuff and repairing the things that need attention and moving so I never have to have him just walk in when he feels like it; what was once him domain.

Saturday, September 05, 2009

College

The kid is off to college....close enough to be home this weekend. I think its going well for her - first week - mood changes every couple days, LOL.

On a serious note, with Breast Cancer Awareness month around the corner, early detection is key! Don't put off those mammograms. I have a journey upon me that I am thinking of as another project in my already busy life. I'm happy to say that it was an early diagnosis but that doesn't change the fact that you hear the doctor's words 'malignant' and 'treatment.'

I usually don't share such personal stuff as this, but I'd like to get the point across to people to please keep your appointments, and schedule appointments annually if you don't already.