The day had started out alright...

...until the ex stopped by to give me a check. I grilled him because he bought a used van and asked for my license number and social security number the other day. It seems he transferred the registration from the old van to the recently purchased van and left my name on the registration. I was asking questions because I don't want to be financially tied to anything. I wanted to know why he didn't take care of it properly so that my name isn't on the registration.

One thing led to another and I'm pretty certain he thought he was being funny with his comments but they stung so deep that I never want to see or talk to him again.

He mentioned the fact that I'll owe him money in a couple years from the house. I was kind enough to give him a portion of that already. He went on to say that there's also interest attached to it. I stated a different number of what I owe him and told him he'll agree to it because when I handed him the last check he berated me and told me what a stupid fu*k I was for having the house reassessed (something you must do during divorce proceedings) because I would have owed him less. He stated he was taking the number listed in the divorce decree (no surprise there) and went on to say that he's going to buy himself a vacation home up north with the money.

He also fished if I took him out my will in regards to who the house would go to should something happen to me. I didn't answer.

I had to walk away so I wouldn't start crying in front of him. I'm glad to know that all I am to him is a pay day.

Instant depression. He pretty much fu*ked up the rest of my day. And unfortunately its unrecoverable because I can't hide it on my face today.

It never ceases to amaze me that I'm not with him anymore and he can still hurt me.

Makes Me Wonder

Maroon 5 Lyrics

Good tune by Maroon 5

How I Really Feel Friday - Rain, Rain, Go Away

The weeks have been chock-full at work which make me so tired in the evening when I'm home that I hardly have time to blog or comment.

I'm looking forward to the weekend but as usual we have very busy social lives, which I love, but it leaves little time to accomplish chores at home. So when the beau gets here we will order pizza and I will attempt to clean or start cleaning tonight so I don't feel guilty running around all weekend long.

His dad has been in the hospital the past two weeks and it's been very touch and go. He seems to have turned a corner the other night and is doing better. I'm not sure if he will get discharged this weekend or if he can even go directly home. He may need to go to a Nursing Home or Rehab facility first. I was sure this was the end of the road for him. That being said, we will be totally available to visit and/or deal with the situation at hand. We have plans to go out tomorrow night to see our favorite band and on Sunday, late afternoon, our good friend is playing (his band) at a festival and we plan to make an appearance there.

So the way that I really feel is I am grateful that the weekend is here for the much needed rest and relaxation time and grateful that we have such a full and fun social life. I am hopeful that I can accomplish everything I hope to and still be sane in the end. I too am grateful that his dad is doing well. Not ready for him to go quite yet.

As my post said last week I will be mindful to recycle all that is me. Enjoy the things I already possess - watch a movie, listen to my music, go through my things and enjoy them.

Here's wishing a wonderful weekend to all.

The photo is the view outside my window at this very moment.
It's drizzly outside; the pansies are under the overhang
so they don't get plummeted by the raindrops.

Mojito Sunday

It's a Mojito Sunday. We (my daughter, her girlfriend and I) woke up early, went to 9:00 a.m. mass, picked up my niece and went to breakfast, stopped and had our eyebrows done on the way home, dropped off my niece at my mother's house and then stopped at the grocery store and picked up limes and mint leaves and came home and made a picture of Mojito's. While they picked up all the twigs in the front yard, I mixed. It should be a good day out in the warm sun.

How I Really Feel Friday - The Sun is Finally Shining

It's a beautiful day, I left work early to enjoy the rest of the afternoon and to get a jump start on house cleaning and chores so I can enjoy the rest of the weekend as the forecast for the next few days is stellar.

Along with that...I need to start walking now that the weather is nice because THE WAY THAT I REALLY FEEL is that I need to walk my fat a$$ off! Yes, exercise...I'm sure it will be a shock to my system BUT I know that I need to do it.

The list of other things I need to do: I can always work harder, save more money, stop swearing so *damn* much, be more patient. I was thinking about these things all afternoon at work. What if my 1997 car breaks down? So I started shopping online to see what I could get and pass down my Buick to my kid as this would be a good, safe first car for her at least in her first year of driving. That's where the work harder and save more $ comes in. Oy! It's not easy being a single parent of household. Yes I get money for the kid from her dad. We're not talking big bucks here and I've maintained my household, the same one I lived in when I was married. There's not a lot of wiggle room in the budget. BUT I will do it - I am determined to do it...somehow.

SO HOW DO I REALLY FEEL? I feel relieved that it's the weekend and want to recycle everything this weekend. Recycle my energy, explore the house and enjoy the things in it and outside all around it as well. Do I really need to go far for entertainment? I have a bevy of entertainment in my life. I need to be "one" with my house this weekend and purge things and enjoy the viable things that exist within it. I need to enjoy my collection of music, and while doing so take care of business at home, all the while saving money as I've not ventured far. I'm sure I have all the things to give myself a spa treatment right within these walls.

I'm thinking if I adjust my thoughts to stay close by I will be productive at home and then fulfilled because of my accomplishments here. I may have to revisit my own post to remind myself of this...several times.

Oh yes, and I do believe it is Earth Day this weekend, speaking of recylcing. So in the name of Earth Day, not only will I be conscience of the environment, but I will recycle me and all of my possessions to make the most of myself and them. And if I stop long enough for a cocktail I will make sure it is green! I will take any and all suggestions for green cocktails.

Have a wonderful weekend everyone and when you're having a cocktail this weekend...make it GREEN...and hold it up high and recite..."to my blogger friends!"

HNT - April Showers

It's been raining all week and I've been waterlogged. But the outlook is good as it's going to be a dry and warm weekend in the 70's! Spring is on it's way?!

Happy HNT!

Water in the basement

Well I haven't left for work yet because I have water in the basement and I'm trying to divert the water away from my new washer and dryer.

Did I mention that times like this sux to be single?

I really didn't want to take today off because I was going to leave early anyway for a dentist appointment and I have tomorrow morning off for another appointment. Don't want to waste my time off.

Oh well. Back to the basement!


Update: 10:18am

Just got back home from Home Depot. First rule of women...don't leave the house without make-up or leaving looking less than good.

I didn't follow my own rule today because I've been sloshing water in the basement and didn't care. Just wanted to go get the stuff I needed and return home to slosh some more water. This nice looking gentleman with beautiful blue penetrating eyes that I stopped to ask for assistance looks me dead in the eyes and says "Is your name Regina?" Right then I shrunk inside as I'm focusing on his name tag. I said, "yes, do I know you?" Apparently he was a truck driver at my first job ever and his brother was a saleman and worked in the office with me. I don't remember the guy or that he worked there but saw the resemblance of his brother. We chatted what seemed like forever as I'm trying not to think of my mismanaged hair and my face looking barren.

At the very least I put on big dark "Jackie-O" sunglasses and lipstick to give the illusion of being made up but I didn't do that either because its dark and dreary and raining.

So ladies - don't be fooled - put on your makeup and fix your hair even if your only running into someplace for a nano second because you don't know who you'll run into!

And most importantly, don't apologize for your looks - that's even less attractive!

What color is your brain?

Your Brain is Blue

Of all the brain types, yours is the most mellow. You tend to be in a meditative state most of the time. You don't try to think away your troubles. Your thoughts are realistic, fresh, and honest. You truly see things as how they are. You tend to spend a lot of time thinking about your friends, your surroundings, and your life.

What Color Is Your Brain?

Maybe my brain is "blue" because I just woke up.

Food overdose - we have friends that are wonderful cooks. Went to their house for dinner last night. They make all these wonderful appetiziers and we usually o.d. on those and cocktails before dinner. The actual dinner wasn't ready until 9:15pm. Prime rib. Oh vey! By the time that came out I could barely eat.

I was supposed to go see Spam A Lot with a friend today but I asked her to pick another "date" for today as the beau's father was admitted to the hospital yesterday and I was concerned that the outlook was bad. He's stable.

I told my daughter and niece I would take them to the salon after church today for nails, pedicure, waxing, etc. Should be fun. Nothing gives me more joy than to watch someone else getting their eyebrows waxed.

Have a wonderful Sunday!

How I Really Feel Friday - TGIF

Work has been so busy and dynamic lately that I've been so tired and have neglected blogging and partaking in HNT.

But TGIF!

We had pizza for dinner tonight. A Friday night ritual for most folks. It was good.

And then last minute decided to go see a movie - something the beau and I never do. It's only the 2nd time in the 3 years we've been together. We went to see Perfect Stranger with Halle Berry and Bruce Willis. I won't give a synopsis or say whether or not if its worth seeing because, frankly, everyone has their own opinion and different tastes.

The beau is in my basement putting new grips on his clubs and I am blogging. The kid is at a friend's house and we should be taking advantage of this time before she comes home, but....he's not thinking.

Happy Weekend Friends!

How I Really Feel Friday - another busy weekend

Another busy weekend upon us. I took today off from work to get some preparation done for the Easter Holiday. I have everyone over on Easter. But I'm feeling a little under the weather. I grocery shopped and was pretty much a couch potato otherwise.

I just wanted to be alone and hang and not entertain anyone and even told the boyfriend to stay away so he didn't get what I have. What do I have???

Have a wonderful weekend everyone!

If you're reading this...please leave me a comment telling me what a tradtional Easter dinner for your family consists of.

Now that's hard core...

...Keith Richards claims he mixed his dead father's ashes with cocaine and snorted them. Yikes! Not so hard to believe. I'd post a picture of him for effect but frankly...he scares me.